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Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down

"Fred?" you say to the panting wolf morph. "Would you get my toolbox? It's in the hall closet."

Fred throws you a puzzled glance, shrugs his shoulders, and ambles to the closet. He returns a minute later with a big red toolbox.

"That's the one," you smile. "There should be a roll of duct tape and some rope inside. Would you get them out?" Fred complies, still puzzled.

With great effort, you cross your flabby gray arms in front of you, so that your wrists are touching. "I want you to tie me up, Fred," you instruct the wolf. "And then tape my mouth shut."

"Whoa!" shouts Fred, dropping the tape and the rope and backing away slowly. "Look, pal, I'm a pretty open-minded guy, but I have to draw the line at..."

"Oh, chill out, Fred!" you shout. "I'm not talking bondage here. It's to stop me from eating. If you leave me here alone, I'll just go on another binge. Now, are you going to help me or not?"

Fred considers your odd request for a moment. Then he says...


Written by Funny Animal

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