The Fiery Foyer

Your wife's cries are interrupted by someone knocking on the door. "That must be the delivery boy!" you exclaim, racing to the foyer to meet him. To your surprise, the "delivery boy" in fact is a delivery girl.

"Hello," she says, making the word sound as if it has more than just two syllables. "I'm Tiffany. I hear that you've requested a divorce." With that, she takes you into her fairylike arms and smothers you with kisses. You reciprocate, except for the part about fairylike arms, and all is well . . . until your wife notices, at least.

"I never!" shrieks your wife. She throws herself down on the floor and holds her bill in her hands to stifle anguished screams. You decide that she will be busy for a while, so you go back to kissing Tiffany while you still can. After all, your two young wards are likely to investigate soon.

Written by Joey Liverwurst

Go off with Tiffany

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