What's a nice german dictator like you doing in a place like this?

Suddenly, a blast of gunfire hurtles through the air. Napoleon slumps to the ground - then immeadiatley gets back up ( duh, he IS dead ). You see a familiar and reviled figure of history suddenly run up - dressed in a stereotypical nazi uniform ( complete with red armbands adorned with swastikas ), he has a perfect moustache and is toting a machine gun - it's HITLER!!

Behind Hitler is a skeletally thin man, dressed in a black robe and with gleaming red eyes. Hitler casually begins shooting everyone. He hits you once or twice, but of course, being dead already, you immeadiately get up - as do the others.

" HITLER, YOU IMBECILE! " bellows an enormously fat man with a cigar dangling from his mouth.

" Could you stop, please? I am trying to write poetry! " says a thin, balding man, who is reclining on a bed and clutching a pad ( now peppered with bullets ). Hitler says nothing, but laughs in awful glee, while the skeletally thin man behind him nods calmly. Eventually the others get bored, and Hitler is quickly subdued and sent away.

" Man.. He's always doing that!! I'm getting bored of it.. " hisses a dark-skinned man with golden teeth, dressed in modern clothes - he looks like a stereotypical rapper.

" Er.. Who are you? " you ask. Some people you recognize, but some are completely unfamiliar to you.

" We're not all people, you know - some of us are personified versions of some evil emotion. " the fat, cigar-smoking man gives a nasty laugh. " I'm greed. That imbecilic ' rapper ' fellow is the spirit of gunslinging and racism. We also have the spirit of violence - a tall, ugly man clutching a club - the spirit of madness, which is a green skinned, monstrous creature called ' Sheogorath ' that constantly laughs insanely, and that creature that Hitler idolises and that inspires him to this foolishness is ' Gulakhan ' - death personified. " the fat man obviously likes talking. He stubs his cigar and lights another.

" Well, you should be getting to Rasputin. Continue down the road, directly onwards, past Hitler and Gulakhans place, past the tower of greed, and you'll come to Rasputins mountain. It's difficult to climb, but don't worry - if you fall off, you can't die. " suddenly you find yourself completely alone in a great black moor. A forest surrounds you and a faintly glowing blue path leads off into the distance.. You can see an odd looking castle some distance ahead, a golden tower even further, and, on the edge of the horizon, snow-capped peaks.

You're screwed.

Written by Goku

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