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Face plant

Slowly, stupidly, you finish your shower, washing much more hair than was originally planned, and you dry yourself off. However, your sudden dumbness seems to have turned you feet to lead, and you trip coming out of the shower, still holding the soap responsible for the rusty-gray colored fur all over your body. As your hands come to and try to cushion the fall, a corner of the soap somehow appeared in your mouth.

Now some soap tastes different than others. Dove has its own somewhat minty flavor, nothing like various hotel soaps and, say Ivory. But the "Wolf Spirit" soap outshone them all.

You just lay there a few minutes, savoring the flavor. Finally, you realize, "I am LICKING a bar of soap that just gave me fur. On the floor, no less," and you spit it out, wash your mouth with clean water, avoiding the soap already there, and go to bed, wondering how you'll cover all the fur on your face in the morning.

When morning does come, you notice some very drastic changes. One: Your nose looks a foot away from when you saw it last. Two: You fall out of bed and notice that you cannot walk on two legs anymore. You now have four digitigrade feet. Three: You have a tail poking out of our pants, same color as the fur. Four: You suddenly have a sensory overload. You smell, see, and hear things like never before. You are colorblind, but who cares when you can just know when there is someone outside even before they ring the doorbell.

As you get used to the idea of walking an all fours, you try to figure out what you will do next.


Written by Harlan Brock

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